Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Honesty

This mountainous moment in my life is fully documented. I am allowed the out-of-body experience of watching it happen from every angle. Apparently some new footage proves I was lying; apparently other footage shows me directly getting hit and a Ha’aretz reporter who claims I was targeted. I can’t watch either video. Sometimes, I can’t believe it happened. I’ve gotten used to the new face in the mirror. But I wonder what they claim I was lying about. Was I lying about spending a week in the hospital, barely able to move, my jaw wired shut, an indented fracture in my skull, not a word of apology from Israel, coming to terms with the compressed visual world I would now view through for the rest of my life?

Hospitable

I have become a minor symbol of solidarity and the occupation, and for this, people are interested in me. I never expected my first shot at recognition would be shrouded in scandal. Sitting underneath our basement staircase in my childhood studio, I dreamed of becoming a great artist. I want to go to this next place where I feel work and love flowing out of me. I want to create commercial art with soul. I want to become a “subjective journalist” - an illustrator traveling, experiencing, remembering, and communicating. But whatever I do, however am perceived, I am an artist. It is in the core of my being.

9 comments:

  1. Then you know you are doing something right.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It sounds like, where you wanted to become, you already are there, in part at least. With time comes perspective.

    For them it is very hard to let go of a political football. New footage, huh. Next they will have a doctored Zapruder film.

    So the challenge is to try not to let it get to you. There's no way around that, now.

    In an OBE, you'll not be using the physical eyes, which are still laying there on the bed or wherever the body is left, and you will find that the 'eyes' in that form have perfect eagle-eyed vision, far beyond the normal, able to see the shadows of dust, etc.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Emily -
    You *ARE* a great artist - and the fact that you're creating and sharing your work with the world in an open-hearted way is the proof of this. You might not *feel* "work and love flowing out of" you - but work is certainly flowing, and love is most of what you are - isn't it?
    One day you will realize it is ALL you are.
    Thanks, as ever, for your beautiful drawing and your candid thoughts. Yours ever,

    ReplyDelete
  4. Emily, this is beautiful. You're beautiful. I love you so much, I'm actually tearing up in the middle of Starbucks as we speak.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I love your work. I've never commented before, but felt compelled to now. Your life and experiences shine through in all of your posts. True art is something that can't be faked, and there is nothing but sincerity coming through here. Don't worry what others say, or how others try to debunk you for their political ends... just continue to be you and to be true to yourself and your work. In that place, that core of who you are, they can't touch you there.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Maybe they don't believe you lost your eye. I don't see what that would accomplish.

    Beethoven and Smetana were deaf. And Smetana rebelled against the Austrian Empire.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hi Emily

    Just read the article about your traumatically life changing experience in Palestine/Israel minutes ago in The Guardian newspaper. I feel humbled by your honesty, integrity & courage. Your clear eyed perspective that the terrible assault you suffered was only newsworthy because of who you were, an American with dual American/Israeli citizenship.

    I look forward very much to exploring your art & writing here now...

    Keep creating Emily!

    Sincerely
    Des Cannon

    Ps. Just noticed the completely unintended pun on your perspective above, it was completely unintentinal believe me. I hate editing my written train of thought after the event, so please accept my apolgy for that inadvertant play of words Emily!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Dear Emily

    You remind me of my beautiful granddaughter just 3 years younger than you now off to college.

    In school in the '60s I wrote a paper on Martin Buber's thinking on dialogue.

    Ideally when we talk to each other we to open our minds and hearts to possibilities of interacting with each other, that the remark of a stranger can change one's life. When such potentials are missing we are probably looking at manipulation, coercion, authoritarianism, apartheid and worse.

    Buber derived his ideas from Prophets. These eschewed both court and priesthood choosing rather to stand at the city gates telling the people to do the right thing.

    I can not help but think of you and your fellow demonstrators at Qalandiya checkpoint (between Jerusalem and Ramallah) and elsewhere as fitting part and parcel into a legacy come down to us from these great men of the Bible.

    What! city gates and checkpoints are more or less the same aren't they - when they exclude?

    So going to demonstrations has something this universal merit, right!

    Your own love of Israel has enabled you to respect and indeed cherish Palestinian love for this land too. You've paid a price but are to be commended. We admire you.

    George Pope
    San Mateo California

    ps your followerers will like your interview with Amy Goodman on DemocracyNow.org Aug 5 2010

    ReplyDelete